A Piece of Me Was Always Missing

Serena Pariser

USA

Visited Nepal: December 10, 2015

– January 30, 2016

My story of what pulled me and kept me from Nepal most of my life is a powerful tale of the warmth of the Nepalese people, their commitment to family, and the exotic beauty and mystic of this country. It’s impossible to arrive and leave Nepal as the same person. I know I did not.

My American father and my Nepalese mother had an arranged marriage when they were 17, in Chukdol Hill, a village located in the Kathmandu Valley. My father was a hippie at heart and took a few years off of medical school to experience the exotic and captivating beauty of Nepal. He fell in love with more than he expected,: my mother.

This would be a romantic love story reminiscent of classic movies: Guy meets girl, guy brings girl back to his family in USA shortly after. Unfortunately, that they were divorced 20 years later.

My father comes from a very traditional Jewish family. Needless to say, I was raised Jewish. To make sure I was officially Jewish, my grandmother even made sure I had a Mikvah, a traditional Jewish ritual given to children to accept them into Judaism.

I never learned more than a word or two of Nepalese, and really actually never cared to. Although I looked Nepalese, everything about my upbringing was Jewish American. Nepalese traditions seemed so strange and foreign to me. My mother would attempt to teach me, but I never accepted the lessons. The only culture I ever identified myself with was Judaism and American. I went did go back to Nepal for a visit during my school summer vacation when I was nine9 years old, but. I only faintly remember that trip.

As I grew older the thought of traveling back to Nepal grew stronger every year. I wanted to meet my family that was living there. My entire mother’s side was still living there. In addition, being a teacher, I wanted to see the schools. I also wanted to see if everything looked the same as I remember from when I was nine.

I’m now 36 years old. It had been 27 years since I’d been to Nepal. I’ve traveled all over the world, but never thought it was the right time to go back to where my parents met and where I still had so much family. There seemed to be one new reason after another not to return. However, my desire to go back crossed a threshold and became too strong to ignore any longer. The tipping point occurred via Facebook. Some of my family invited me back to Nepal. The invite was too good to be true. I didn’t think twice. I couldn’t explain why—I just had to go. The feeling was overwhelming.

Landing in Tribhuvan Airport in Kathmandu Valley was one of the most surreal experiences . My memories of Kathmandu Valley were mostly of Chukdol Hill. I remember running around the muddy hills barefoot and seeing cows walking up and down. I remember showering outside in the village “pipe” that had the only running water on the hill. I remember my grandmother cooking large pots of rice over an open fire. I remember pigeons, lots of pigeons, everywhere and my grandfather praying around them. It all made me wish I’d come back sooner, before he passed on.

As I walked out of the airport I was bombarded by white taxis. Immediately breaking through the wall of taxis was my family, rushing up to greet me. .In Nepal, distant family is as loyal and loving to you as your immediate family. My cousins took me into their home and we reintroduced ourselves. It had been 27 years since I’d been back. Still, judging by their warmth, it was clear that I was with family.

The next day, I woke to the sounds of fruit and vegetable vendors in the street, prayer bells ringing, children laughing and playing, and delicious scents sizzling from the kitchen. I knew I was home. I felt connected to all of it. I spend the next two months meeting an almost dizzying amount of family. Every family member that I met welcomed me into their homes for dinner or even to stay a few days. I was overwhelmed with what Americans might consider to be almost too generous. To Nepalese, this is naturally what you do with family.

My family took me to Chitwan National park where I rode elephants, watched rhinos bathe, and sat peacefully in a wooden canoe while alligators sunbathed just a few feet from me. They took me to Nargarkot where I saw breathtaking 360-degree views of the Himalayas and watched rural village life in the surrounding hills. We also visited Pokhara, which was my favorite! I could have stayed there for weeks. There’s nothing like the majestic Himalayas framing the backdrop of a beautiful lake. While there, we hiked to the Peace Pagoda, boated around the lake, ate delicious organic food, and saw the sunrise over the Himalayas.

I celebrated Nepali holidays for the first time ever with my family in Nepal. They taught me about customs and traditions that were new to me, yet felt beautiful and spiritual, as are many things are in Nepal.

Kathmandu has changed a lot since I was nine. There are more cars, and it’s significantly more developed, causing many of the cows to have left for the countryside. However, the people haven’t changed. Regardless of whether they’re family members, merchants at the market, taxi drivers, neighbors, or just people I met walking down the street, they all shared a common warmth., something often missing from westernized countries.

There are many significant reasons to come to Nepal, such as some of the most breathtaking and mystical sights in the world. Nepal will also show you the beauty in simplicity, how we often make things too complex, and how it’s okay to slow the pace of our lives. Nepal will pull at your heartstrings, too. There’s a magic to Nepal that I have yet to find anyplace in the world. Nepal isn’t a place to come “see things.” It’s a place to experience life from a completely different angle, to see the highest mountains in the world, and to meet people that are contagiously happy. It’s impossible to arrive and leave Nepal as the same person.

The aspect that sets it apart from any other destination though is the people. The genuine love and respect they have for one another, the sense of love for their country, and the way they welcome all travelers with open arms provide plenty of incentive for repeat visits.. There’s a reason people call Nepal “Never Ending Peace and Love.” That is exactly what this beautiful country is.

There was never any resentment with the Nepalese people or my family as to why I never embraced the Nepali culture as a child. As soon as I arrived, it felt as if Nepal was speaking to me and saying, “What took you so long?” I know I am still a Jewish girl by faith, but I now feel more than ever that I am a Nepalese girl by blood. That piece of me is no longer missing. I won’t wait 27 years again for my next trip home.